This Happened to Me by Kate Price

Author:Kate Price
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Gallery Books
Published: 2025-08-05T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 26

“WHAT ABOUT YOUR MOTHER?” BESSEL asked in our next session. “Where was she in all of this? What role did she play?”

After returning to Cambridge the week prior, I had sprinkled the remaining portion of my mother’s ashes outside of my apartment building. I’d kept a small scoop of them in a silver heart-shaped box I’d bought in India. I’d spread most of my third (Sissy and Gerry had also gotten equal portions) of her ashes in Boston Harbor next to Christopher Columbus Park, where we’d watched planes approach and take off from Logan, and back home in the Susquehanna River, where she loved boating with Gerry.

I’d held on to a bit of her remains because I hadn’t been ready to let her go. I still needed the ability to be in the same room as my mother, even if only with her ashes. Granting her wish of moving far away from home had been harder than she ever could have imagined. But now, five years after my mother’s death, it was time. While I would one day move from this place, she would forever linger in the soil and trees. I’d like to think she was at peace being in the place she desired most for me.

“I don’t really know,” I said, replying to Bessel’s pointed question about my mother. “I mean, we were all terrified of him. I’m not sure what she was supposed to do. Although I do wish child welfare had realized we weren’t safe and taken me and Sissy out of there, even just for a little bit.”

“That’s a big statement. I’m not sure I agree. You had a very strong attachment to your mother. You identified with her—baking, concerts, your shared commitment to education. Not to mention the abuse you may have faced in foster care had you been removed.”

“Well, it couldn’t have been any worse than our home,” I said, emboldened. Even though Bessel was the expert, he hadn’t grown up in my house.

“But at least you knew how to survive there. And you made some happy memories with your mom,” Bessel pressed.

“I suppose,” I said. “But I still wish we would have been taken out of harm’s way.”

“Okay. I’m still going to disagree,” he replied. “I think we can, however, agree your mother didn’t protect you. She stood by as your father hit your sister, and she pulled you back inside after your father pulled Sissy’s bedroom door off its hinges to get to her. You both deserved to be protected.”

There was no arguing with that.

“I suggest we skip EMDR today. Take a rest. I know how difficult this has been and how hard you’ve been working. But know that it’s paying off. You’ve accomplished so much in just a few sessions.”

I agreed to his plan and appreciated the break. This was a lot to handle in one session. The therapy was both invigorating and exhausting. Yet I could already feel my father’s grip start to loosen.

“Plus, we need to care for your brain.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.